novelWhy Are You Being So Nice To Me
| ← Ch.417 | Ch.419 → |
" Ji Cheng." Zhao Ming called him out as she held her head down.
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Ji Cheng raised his brows seeing her pale complexion and serious expression.
His smile disappeared as he asked, " What happened?"
He looked at her seriously as he stretched his hand and placed it on her hand which was on her lap.
" Can I ask you something?" Zhao Ming raised her head as she looked into his dark orbit eyes.
Ji Cheng nodded as he looked at her seriously.
He does not know what she was about to ask but from her expressions it was clear that she wasn't in the mood to goof around.
" Why... Are you being so nice to me?" she asked as she looked into his eyes with questions.
Ji Cheng was surprised for a moment when he heard her question. His lips pursed as he was unsure how to answer this question.
" What do you mean by this? Can't I be nice to my wife? " he asked her a question in return.
He couldn't understand what she meant by her question.
Zhao Ming shook her head and said, " That's not what I mean. I mean why are you being so nice to me now? You know that I don't have my past memories. However, I had heard many things from the people, how you never glanced at me before. You always ignored me and never interfered when Empress Dowager and Xiao Li treated me badly."
She has heard many servants talking behind her back here and there and also Lu shi has also told her many things about the past.
" But I am curious why your attitude suddenly changed? You even argued with your mother and Xiao Li for me. Why are you suddenly treating me so nicely?"
She was feeling uncomfortable because he was treating her with care and extremely nice. Though she didn't hate this, however, she was feeling uncomfortable because she is not Zhao Ming.
She knows that his love and care was for Zhao Ming and she is enjoying everything in her stead.
Ji Cheng pursed his lips as he stared at her. His eyes dimmed as he finally spoke.
He pursed his lips as he realized that it's time that he needed to talk to her about this.
" At first I was unsure of my feelings towards you. When I first saw you when I was 15 years old, I was puzzled because it was the first time I smiled when I saw you." a smile appeared on his lips when he remembered how adorable she looked while playing with a butterfly when he saw her for the first time.
" I grew up while seeing the harsh reality of the palace and was forced to learn those things which I was not fond of because I had to become the Emperor in the future. I had to hide my feelings and learn to be cold and ruthless for the sake of taking the throne in the future."
Ji Cheng's expressions were complicated and full of old painful memories.
" After when my grandfather, the old Emperor, fixed our marriage I was happy yet a little upset that I was dragging you with me to face the bitter reality of the palace."
" However, after our engagement got fixed, I went to the borders to learn martial arts and war techniques and eventually went to the war. The experience of war was brutal and bloody. Without my knowing, the little innocence that left inside me died when I saw my friend who was also my comrade dying in front of me."
Ji Cheng's hand trembled as he remembered that scene. It was his first ever war that he attended and it was brutal and blood was everywhere.
" That day i realized that even though I am the future Emperor, I can't save everyone. I wasn't able to save the people who were close to me. Slowly and steadily I lost contact with people and started detaching myself. The emotions inside me started to disappear slowly."
He remembered how he has become a heartless man from being an innocent boy. At a young age, the experience of war made him heartless and ruthless.
Zhao Ming glanced at Ji Cheng as she felt pity for him. He has to see the brutal side of the world as such a young age.
The pain in his eyes was visible. He looked vulnerable while talking about the dark past.
" Then when I came back after years, I had to ascend the throne and had to marry you to fulfill the promise I made to grandfather." his expressions softened as he talked about the past.
" However, at that time I was so frustrated and stressed because I recently lost my grandfather, had to take the responsibility of being the Emperor. Also, I feel bad and envious of you at the same time because you seemed to be unaware of the difficulties and cruel side of the Palace."
" I didn't know how to respond when you smiled looking at me. It was getting hard for me to get adjusted to the normal life after he came back from the war."
" But soon after we got married, I didn't get the time to talk to you and know you when I had to go for another war and this time, it was for my people and my Empire in danger."
" At that time, I was not the prince like before. I was the Emperor and that's why the responsibility was bigger.
" After our marriage, I was in the war and after months when I returned I came with Xiao Li. But Zhao Ming, trust me, I never wanted this marriage to happen. However, at that time, I had no option. I had to marry her to make alliance with L country to prevent war with them."
Zhao Ming pursed her lips and asked, " But you must have other options than marrying her? Marrying someone for an alliance? Is that what you left with at that time? " she asked with curiosity.
She has seen the different world with different rules, so she was trying to understand what compelled him to take his step.
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Ji Cheng looked at her and continued, " Yes. That was my last option. My Empire was not stable at that time and if L country waged war on us at that time, I wouldn't be able to save Ji Dynasty, the people living here nor my family."
He said with all seriousness. Because he knows that if they would have lost a war, then not only his Empire and territory would have lost in the war but the lives of thousands of people and his family would have been destroyed for sure.
In the war, women have to bear the consequences of the war between men. They use women as their weapon and use their bodies to please their lust. He has seen the cruelty of the war, that's why he knows this.
However, he didn't go into details of how she would have been in danger if they would have lost in war.
Because they would have used her as his weakness to pull him down.
He could bear to lose his Empire but cannot see someone hurting Zhao Ming. But in the end, he was the one who hurted her the most.
| ← Ch. 417 | Ch. 419 → |