novel
| ← Ch.012 | Ch.014 → |
"..."
How could I answer that question?
The answer could be both yes and no. Technically, I had a home. In Seoul, Korea. However, if he asked HOW I would get home, I wouldn't be able to answer him.
I spent all my time and effort for the last year to fit into this world. I never had the chance to think about how I would go back. Besides, was it even possible?
My heart felt heavy.
The emperor obviously didn't know about my dilemma. He wanted a logical answer.
Could I tell him the truth? That I came from a different world, and I wanted to go back somehow?
No. He would think I had lost my mind. He might even kill me since he would consider me useless.
This was a hard question to answer.
I decided to give him a vague reply.
"... you shouldn't have to worry about that."
He smiled faintly. Was it even a smile?
"I see."
Lucretius narrowed his eyes. He gave me a sharp knowing look.
He didn't believe me. He was used to people lying to him all the time. He needed to be calculating and always suspect the worst of people. I realized I made the right choice by not telling him the truth. He wasn't someone I could trust.
Lucretius grinned at me widely. It was a chilling smile.
"I know one thing for sure. You do have a place you can go back to, and you are desperate to get there."
"Whatever you say, your highness."
"When I heard Duke Aeal is sending his adopted daughter, I assumed he found one of his bastard daughters from somewhere instead of his legitimate daughter. Things like this actually happen quite frequently."
I remained silent.
"But now that I see you, I think I understand. I don't think you are related to the duke at all."
"..."
"The Bonafit family has black hair, which is very unusual. When I first saw you, I assumed you were the duke's bastard daughter. You don't resemble him, but your hair does." He played with the leftover pieces of onion and pumpkin as he continued calmly, "Other than the black hair, you look too different from those who live in the north. You also don't resemble those from the southern desserts. To be honest, I have never seen someone like you before. Your facial features are very unique."
He was analyzing me like a profiler. The scary thing was that he was getting it right.
"Your manner is very good, as if you have been educated, but it doesn't seem like you grew up with it. The common etiquette seem new to you still. I think... you grew up in a completely different culture. It doesn't seem like the duke got a low born girl and taught her. It was more like he got a well-educated person from a completely different country and taught our customs."
"..."
He was very good.
My back was wet with sweat. He smiled as if he knew he got it right.
"... which means you do have a place to go back. In theory, you are from the Aeal colony, but you didn't ask to let you return there. You asked me to let you leave the castle. You don't plan on going back to that colony, I know that for sure now. I guess it doesn't really matter though. You can't leave."
I sighed in surrender and replied, "... even if I tell you the truth, you wouldn't believe me anyway."
"What?"
He frowned as if I swore at him.
He lowered his voice and asked in a threatening manner, "What I believe or not believe shouldn't be yours to decide. I find it very disturbing that you are trying to hide something from me. You are the one asking for a favor, yet you won't even give me a full explanation?"
Should I tell him? Would he believe me?
This was such a dangerous game. This was the man who killed his own father in front of me two nights ago. Would this be the death of me?
I sighed deeply and asked, "Then... Could you promise me something, your highness?"
"A promise? You didn't even give me an explanation yet."
"Please don't automatically assume I'm crazy or joking after you hear what I have to say. Keep an open mind."
Lucretius looked at me questioningly. He seemed confused at my seriousness.
He nodded. My heart pounded hard as I said to him, "I... came from a different world."
Silence.
I couldn't tell what the emperor was thinking.
Shock? Suspicion? I would have been happy with these emotions.
What I was afraid of was he would think I was crazy and lock me up somewhere.
I felt so nervous. He continued to study me penetratingly.
After a few minutes of silence, he finally replied, "... you don't look or act crazy, but..."
"... but?"
He twirled his finger around my temple.
"Your calm behavior doesn't necessarily mean you aren't crazy, I guess."
I knew it!
I bit my lips and replied heatedly, "So your words mean nothing."
Lucretius's face turned blank.
He agreed to not think that I was crazy, yet here he was breaking his promise! He deserved my disapproval.
His silence and emotionless face scared me, but I tried my best to hide it.
To act this brazenly in front of a murderer! Perhaps I was really crazy.
He agreed on a promise though! he was the emperor too!
I continued to glare at him.
To my surprise, he nodded in the end.
"You're right."
"P, pardon?"
"My bad. I did promise you to keep an open mind, yet I broke my promise."
I couldn't help but be suspicious of his sudden accommodating demeanor.
I asked, "Then you believe me?"
As I suspected, Lucretius didn't nod.
He shook his head and replied, "I promised to keep an open mind, not to believe your words blindingly."
"But..."
When I tried to interrupt, he continued quickly, "But I do believe that you aren't intentionally lying to me. Especially since you won't gain anything by making up such a strange story."
He was right.
"And your behavior tells me you have a good head on your shoulders. I see you studying me and the situation carefully and making sound decisions. A madwoman wouldn't behave like that."
"..."
"But to believe your words outright... It's just too ridiculous."
"That's understandable."
"Which means either someone tricked you into believing this, or you are one of those crazy people who act calm."
I glared at him and declared firmly, "I'm not crazy."
"Sure." Lucretius smiled at me dryly.
I hated him at that moment.
"Well, I will at least keep my promise."
"So you'll believe me?"
"No."
"You, I mean your highness... !"
"But I will pretend to believe you for now."
"Pretend?"
"That's right. Pretend. As I promised, I won't automatically assume you're crazy. I didn't promise to believe you though. I don't know you very well yet. Your story is too crazy for me to believe at this point."
"Then you are asking me to convince you?"
"That's right. Until I really believe you, I will 'pretend' to believe you."
"... alright. I will take it."
A comprise of both of us.
I sighed again deeply. How would I convince this man who probably grew up doubting everything and everyone?
He asked me.
"But if you came from a different world... You want to go back there if you leave this castle?"
"Of course. I want to go back. If you were in my position, wouldn't you want the same thing?"
"Well, I'm not sure. Remember, I killed my own father. I don't have any friends. I don't know if I would want to return."
"..."
Somehow, I could understand why this man in front of me turned out the way he did.
Not a single friend. What kind of life did he live here? His infuriating personality probably formed from his unusual upbringing.
My face must have held a sympathetic expression. He was chewing a piece of white bread and looking at me oddly.
I consoled him with genuine concern.
"It's okay. You have a long life ahead of you, right? I'm sure you will make at least one friend in the future. Besides, you are in a better situation than I am. I am in a strange world with no one to help me."
He raised his eyebrows sharply. Oh, did I go too far?
"Stop it."
When he ordered me angrily, I bowed my head.
"Yes, your highness."
He looked at me suspiciously and said to me, "And I can't let you leave this castle."
| ← Ch. 012 | Ch. 014 → |