novelA Sudden Dizziness Came Over Song Yu As Soon As She Stood Up (Free Mini-Scene of Chengzhi As A Little Boy)
| ← Ch.178 | Ch.180 → |
Translator: EndlessFantasy Translation Editor: EndlessFantasy Translation
"To be honest, Song Yu, I envy you a lot. My big brother loves you so much and puts you before anything else. The things I want are simple—really simple. I'm not demanding my partner to have a high social standing or strong financial abilities. I don't even mind it if he's from the working class, as long as he treats me well with all his heart and doesn't betray the love that I give to him." Qi Chengyue nearly choked while she spoke. Her shoulders were trembling continuously.
"Jian Yi had nothing when I first got into a relationship with him. If I really cared about all those things, why would I agree to marry him? I only love one person, and now that he and I are married, I want to be loved in the same way too. I also want to be loved, to be cared for, and to be well protected.
"I want him to feel a twinge in his heart even if it's just for a small cut on my finger. When I'm sick, he'll be beside me; when I cry, he'll wipe my tears away lovingly. I want him to miss me when I'm not beside him, and when he goes away on business, I want him to take the initiative to call me and talk to me about his day. I want him to hold my hand on the street, and to reserve the front passenger seat for only me."
Song Yu sat there in silence. She felt some discomfort in her throat because of Qi Chengyue's words.
She watched as crystal-clear tears oozed out from between Qi Chengyue's fingers, flowing down the back of her hand like a stream.
"I don't understand it at all. I loved him with all my heart. Why must he... Why must he insist on taking advantage of me? I am okay with it, but what I want is for him to love me too. Even if he's taking advantage of me, he should at least love me a bit more. What else am I lacking..." Qi Chengyue wept and sobbed profusely."Tell me, Song Yu, what must I do to earn a man's love? What did I do wrong? I'm willing to change. I just want someone to love me sincerely. Why... Why must he treat me like this...
"Did you know? His mother... The credit card that his mother normally uses is under my name. I'm the one who's paying the credit card debt every single month. When you met her and Guan Xiaolin that day, she used my money to buy clothes for herself. She's using my money, but she's strolling around with Jian Yi's mistress, laughing and smiling. Both mother and son... Both mother and son treat me like I'm nothing...
"I love Jian Yi, but I still have self-respect. I don't want them to take advantage of me and bully me. Jian Yi and I have been brutally honest with each other since early on. He's never touched me after we got married. After the marriage, there was once I ran back to my home because of Zhou Mingyan. That's not the only time she bullied me, but I didn't dare to go back home again. I'm scared that my parents and my brother will get worried, and I was also afraid that they'd do something bad to Jian Yi.
"Even though I've always been unable to come to terms with things and I'm always arguing with him, deep down, I will always give thought to him. For his sake, I even hid things from my family, but they don't even appreciate the things I do for them. Zhou Mingyan takes everything that I do for granted, while Jian Yi thinks that just because I love him, I should give him everything unconditionally without expecting anything in return. It's like I shouldn't even be expecting him to love me. To him, the fact that he married me is sufficient reciprocation.
"I'm stupid, Song Yu. I really think I'm stupid. To think that I lowered myself to such a level just for them. I'm just something that they can trample on whenever they like. But I loved him, Song Yu, why... Why can't I have a happy ending? I'm jealous of you, really jealous... I'm scared and I don't know what's going to happen in the future. I don't think I can continue being with him, but I can't accept it... I can't accept that I'm not worth a single damn thing to him even though I loved him and poured out my everything for him all these years."
Song Yu's eyes began reddening too. At that moment, both of Qi Chengyue's elbows were placed onto the table while she used her palms to cover her face. She was crying as helplessly as a baby.
Song Yu once thought that Qi Chengyue was a stubborn woman who had been spoiled rotten by family.
Marriage, however, changed Qi Chengyue a lot. It was then that Song Yu realized how much effort Qi Chengyue put into the marriage and how much wrong she had suffered.
As the Qi family's darling daughter, it was appalling that Qi Chengyue was willing to lower her standards and allow both Jian Yi as well as Zhou Mingyan to oppress her.
She even hid the things that happened just so her family would not be worried about her. She did that for Jian Yi's sake too, because she was afraid of letting her family find out Jian Yi's true nature.
Trapped in the middle, she was the one who suffered the most.
Song Yu got up from the chair. She walked over and knelt down beside Qi Chengyue.
She hugged Qi Chengyue tenderly and began stroking the latter's hair softly."Silly girl, why didn't you say anything? Why did you choose to hold everything in by yourself and suffer so much? You kept everything from your family. They're going to find out that when you needed their help and protection the most, they were completely in the dark and were unable to help you at all. How would your family feel if they knew the truth? That they couldn't help you when you were being persecuted like that?
"Family exists for a reason and it is to help each other in times of need. When you're weak, they will help you; when you need someone to rely on, they'll support you; when you have nowhere to go, they'll open their doors for you; when you're helpless, they're a reliable place of refuge.
"You're the Qi family's honorable daughter, and the younger sister of Chengzhi and Chenglin—their one and only younger sister. You have three strong elder brothers. How could you let just them watch as their younger sister is getting bullied? How could you let your brothers just stand there like idiots? How could you let Jian Yi think that he could bully you right under their noses? You're going to just let Jian Yi make fun of them and think that he could play the Qi family for fools?"
Qi Chengyue wailed uncontrollably, then turned and placed her forehead to Song Yu's shoulder. Qi Chengyue's own shoulders were trembling incessantly.
She cried for a very long time before being able to calm herself down.
Song Yu neither urged nor comforted her; merely letting her cry it all out on Song Yu's shoulder.
Qi Chengyue's breath stuttered a few times as she sat back upright. She looked at Song Yu, then looked down again, before choking and saying, "I'm sorry."
It was not known whether the apology was for wetting Song Yu's clothes or because of her attitude toward Song Yu in the past.
All Song Yu could do was smile and shake her head. She passed the box of tissues to Qi Chengyue so the latter could wipe away the tears and mucus.
"Can you please not tell the family everything I told you today?" Qi Chengyue continued, "Since it's already in the past, I don't want them to worry."
"Of course." Song Yu nodded before getting up and resuming her original seat.
Qi Chengyue's nostrils were blocked because of the mucus she produced while crying. Completely unable to breathe, she had to exert a lot of strength and blow her nose a couple of times.
"When my brother told me about Jian Yi and Guan Xiaolin yesterday, I actually wasn't surprised that he would have an affair. It's not solely Guan Xiaolin's fault. I wasn't willing to help him set up his own business, and I didn't want to say good things about him to my brother because that will make the company attach more importance to him. He knew that he couldn't get anything from me, so he's expanding his network. In fact, I expected as much, but it wasn't until just now that I realized I already foresaw all this happening." Qi Chengyue smiled self-deprecatingly and inhaled in short fits.
She made a great effort to endure everything yesterday, and by virtue of that she did not break down.
She knew that her disposition yesterday was rather frosty, eliciting the curiosity of Qi Chenglin.
The reality was that she did not dare to talk about it too much. She was afraid that if she said a bit more, the floodgates would open and she would burst into sobs.
"I loved him, but I've also been hurt by him. But even if I still love him and I'm still unwilling to part with him, I won't think about keeping him to myself again." Qi Chengyue paused for a moment, but her hands—which she placed on the table—were trembling like mad.
Song Yu knew that Qi Chengyue's inner emotions were not as calm as the spoken word.
"I'll divorce him, but I'll listen to you and pretend that nothing happened. Once my brother gets the evidence, I'll divorce him. I won't give him the chance to take anything from the Qi family!" Qi Chengyue exclaimed furiously, but despite the firmness in her tone, tears started falling out from her eye sockets as soon as she finished talking.
After all, it was a marriage she very much looked forward to.
The ceremony back then was so grand, with pretty much the entire city giving her well wishes, but barely a few months had passed since then...
Song Yu sighed in her heart and muttered, "Eat something. You're not in a good mood, and if you go hungry, it'll be bad for your body."
Qi Chengyue dried her tears, nodded, and ate some rice. However, she felt as though something was stuck in her throat, and no matter how much she tried swallowing, she was unable to do so.
Song Yu let out a breath and also had some rice. She took a piece of grilled fish but found the taste unappealing—almost making her vomit. She drank a few gulps of water to wash away the fishy taste. Then, she ate another a few mouthfuls of rice. Taking a bite out of a deep-fried pork rib, she found it unpalatably greasy.
In the end, she forced herself to eat some vegetable salad and some fruits. After two sips of miso soup, she could not stomach anything else again.
Qi Chengyue's mood was terrible and her appetite was even worse. The two of them only ate a tiny bit, and the entire meal looked as though it had never been touched.
Qi Chengyue frowned and asked, "I don't have any appetite, but why didn't you eat much too?"
Song Yu shook her head."I don't know if they changed the chef or something like that. I just feel like today's food is terrible. I can't stomach it.
Qi Chengyue nodded, to which Song Yu asked, "Do you want to continue sitting here for a while?"
"It's okay." Qi Chengyue got up, then remarked embarrassedly, "I've wasted enough of your time. Let's go."
Song Yu smiled, for she never expected that a day would come when Qi Chengyue would be so genuinely courteous to her.
It was a Japanese-themed restaurant, so they had to get up from the cushion that they had been sitting on for quite some time.
A sudden dizziness came over Song Yu as soon as she stood up. Her vision faded to pitch-black and she saw stars, exactly like how those old televisions sets would fade away.
Song Yu did not stand too steadily, and if it were not for Qi Chengyue, she would have fallen to the ground.
"Are you okay?!" Qi Chengyue asked anxiously.
Song Yu frowned, and the stars slowly began to disappear after a while. Soon, her vision returned and she could see everything clearly again.
She shook her head and said, "I'm okay. I think I stood up a bit too suddenly just now."
"Are you really okay?" Qi Chengyue still did not feel too reassured. Although she and Song Yu were not necessarily on good terms, she had earlier poured out emotionally all her frustrations to Song Yu, and by virtue of that, their relationship had taken an imperceptible turn for the better.
Most importantly, if Qi Chengzhi found out that something happened to Song Yu when the latter was with her, she had to bear the weight of it.
It was especially so when there used to be bad blood between the two women. In the past, she treated Song Yu badly, and even if she pleaded her innocence, Qi Chengzhi might not believe her so easily.
After the food was paid, Qi Chengyue felt relieved only after sending Song Yu back to the company.
Qi Chengyue sent Song Yu up, then advised her to visit the doctor if there was anything wrong or at least tell Qi Chengzhi if something happens. Ruan Danchen was not privy to their past animosity, so when she saw the entire scene, she thought that their relationship had always been that cordial.
Ruan Danchen remarked with full of admiration, "Song Yu you're really... I never thought that you were on such good terms with your sister-in-law."
"..." At that moment, Song Yu felt that Ruan Danchen was always one to focus on things that other people did not normally focus on.
...
...
Qi Chengyue left Chengshi's building and got into her car, but at that point, she did not know where to go.
She drove to Qilin, got down, and looked at Qilin's grand entrance without being able to bring herself to take a single step.
She could not help but think about how, if she was not born into the Qi family, she would not have had any value worth taking advantage of. In that way, she would never have met Jian Yi, and she would not have to go through such a terrible marriage.
After a brief moment of hesitation, she turned to leave.
Walking aimlessly, she stopped abruptly to look up and sigh at the sky. Depressed, she realized that other than being lucky to be born in the Qi family, virtually every other aspect of her life was a failure.
"I'm standing at the entrance to the café that I'm supposed to be meeting him at. He's not here yet. When he comes, I'll be as frank as possible with him and I won't be making any small talk." All of a sudden, Qi Chengyue heard a woman's voice. When she looked over, she realized she stopped at the café right beside Qilin.
She then refocused her gaze and glanced upon the woman who was making a call. The woman seemed very familiar.
Qi Chengyue stared at the woman and thought long and hard before realizing that the woman was Cheng Dongge's girlfriend. Previously she saw the woman at Qilin a couple of times, waiting at the lobby for Cheng Dongge to finish work. Qi Chengyue saw her before but never greeted her.
As to the woman's name, Qi Chengyue had forgotten it completely.
Rumor has it that Cheng Dongge already proposed marriage. Qi Chengyue looked at the woman's left hand—the one which held the phone—and saw that there was a diamond ring on her middle finger.
While Qi Chengyue was lost in thought, she heard the woman say, "Don't worry. I won't go soft on him. I've been thoroughly disappointed in him since long ago. He's busy all the time, and when he's busy, he's being busy for someone else. What has he achieved after being busy for so many years? He's still only an assistant. If the reason why he has no time for me is that he's powerful enough to be busy for himself, I can probably be patient with him. But he's working for someone else! All these years he's never gotten a promotion even though he works overtime as if there's no difference between day and night. Most of the time I don't even see him. What's the difference between having him as my boyfriend and being single?
"If things are already like this before we're married, what's gonna happen after the marriage? He won't even have me in his thoughts at all. He's never been there for me whenever I needed him, and he doesn't even know what I want. No matter what the occasion is, it's always dinner and flowers. There's no sincerity from him. To be honest, my feelings for him have disappeared since long ago, but he's the one who kneeled down and asked for my hand in marriage. I pitied him because he was in front of all those people, and it was only because I didn't want him to be put on the spot that I reluctantly agreed."
The woman then switched her phone to her right hand. She opened all five fingers of her left hand and looked at the ring on her middle finger, remarking disdainfully, "But he did put some thought into the ring he gave me. I think I'll keep it."
"...."
"Don't think so much. He doesn't have a place in my heart anymore. You obviously know that I like you now. I'm just keeping the ring to give him some dignity. Don't you know he's a really proud man? Even if I want to return it to him, he'll insist proudly that he wants me to keep it, saying that he never takes back the things that he has given. Since he wants to pretend that he's generous, I'm simply helping him accomplish his aim by keeping the ring."
"..."
"He's here. We'll talk later."
"..."
"I love you too."
The woman hung up and morphed her contemptuous expression into one that was gentle. She lowered her head slightly, while her hands—which were holding her handbag—were placed in front of her body. Added to that was a pitiable, burdened state of mind.
Qi Chengyue clicked her tongue. She was fuming so hard at that audacious woman, to the point where she forgot the despair and depression brought about by her own marriage.
She looked in the exact direction the woman was looking at and saw Cheng Dongge walking over.
That well-dressed, earnest, and thoughtful man was the assistant that Qi Chengzhi placed the most trust in.
Qi Chengyue once heard Qi Chenglin mention that Qi Chengzhi would allow Cheng Dongge to assume the position of Qilin Properties' general manager once Qi Zhongliang and Qi Zhongxun retired. That was the reason why Qi Chengzhi had Cheng Dongge participate in many of the company's important business deals during the last few years.
How foolish of the woman to look down on a man like Cheng Dongge.
"Why didn't you wait inside?" Cheng Dongge walked over and frowned.
While his heavy workload did mean that he had little time to spend with his fiancée, Qi Chengyue could see that there was so shortage of the care and love he gave to the woman.
Qi Chengyue was very envious. Before that day, she was willing to trade everything just so Jian Yi could do the same to her.
The woman was about to speak, but Cheng Dongge noticed Qi Chengyue, who stood rooted to the ground and had forgotten to conceal herself.
"Miss Qi, " Cheng Dongge greeted, somewhat shocked.
Qi Chengyue nodded plainly, but it was Cheng Dongge's fiancée that was in a state of shock.
During the phone call earlier, she did notice Qi Chengyue standing to one side as if waiting for someone.
However, she did not know who Qi Chengyue was and hence did not care. She treated Qi Chengyue as a stranger, caring not if a stranger happened to hear what she said. It scarcely occurred to her that the woman was someone Cheng Dongge knew. At that instant, she immediately turned anxious.
"No introductions?" Qi Chengyue raised an eyebrow, provoking the woman with a glance.
Cheng Dongge did not know what Qi Chengyue was planning on doing, but he said, "This is my fiancée, Huang Ziyue. Ziyue, this is the daughter of the Qi family, the youngest of five siblings."
Huan Ziyue's expression changed dramatically. She forced out a stiff smile and called out, "Miss Qi."
Qi Chengyue nodded and replied, "I shall not bother you."
Having said that, she turned to leave, eliciting a sigh of relief from Huang Ziyue. The latter was indubitably afraid that Qi Chengyue would spill everything to Cheng Dongge.
Cheng Dongge and Huang Ziyue entered the café, but Qi Chengyue suddenly halted her steps and formed her hands into a fist.
"Qi Chengyue, this has nothing to do with you, don't be a busybody, " she muttered softly to herself. Her legs did not get the message though, for she soon began walking back into the café.
As a result of Jian Yi's lies and deceit, she was unable to stand the sight of those who treated love as a game, using money and position to quantify relationships. She saw Cheng Dongge pouring his heart out, but she could not bear to look at how he was being played by the person he loved, especially when he was taking the relationship and marriage seriously.
Cheng Dongge's face was sullen and his expression, stiff. Although he did not beg pitiably or do anything of the sort, he was striving hard to endure it all.
Huang Ziyue, on the other hand, had a pitiable and guilty look. Qi Chengyue knew not of what Huang Ziyue was saying but surmised that she was probably pretending to be a saint.
With reddened and teary eyes, Huang Ziyue said, "Dongge, you're a good person, but I... I'm not good enough. I'm not the kind of woman who can take care of herself. I need a man who will always be by my side. When I'm sick, you're never with me. I want to talk to you when I'm frustrated at work and bullied by my colleagues, but you're always too busy. I've been thinking about it for a long time, and I realize I can't accept a lonely marriage where my husband's too busy to be beside me. I can't be a good wife, and I don't want to waste your time. I'm sorry..."
- - - - - - -
And now, a free mini-scene that won't be counted in the word count. But before you read it, your fee will be a monthly vote. Please vote! Computer clients vote too~~
The Happiest Day of My Life:
When Qi Chengzhi was in the fourth year of primary school, the teacher gave homework in the form of an essay. Each student was required to write an essay titled 'The Happiest Day of My Life'. The next day, every student would have to read it out loud in front of the whole class.
The next day came, and Qi Chengzhi was called up.
He held up his workbook and began reading aloud solemnly:
"The Happiest Day of My Life.
"In the past, people asked me, do you like this girl? I will always answer, the girl I like is not born yet. Yesterday, the girl I liked was finally born. My future wife is nine years younger than me. When she was born, my dream of having a young wife finally came true. My future wife is so considerate and thoughtful, even though she was only just born. I am happy that I did not like the wrong person. So, the happiest day of my life was yesterday. To celebrate, I took out my grandpa's old Pu'er tea that he hid inside the cupboard. Then, I gave it to Aunt Liu so she can cook tea eggs. I will give them to everyone to celebrate the happiness with me."
The teacher was speechless.
When he returned home that very day, his grandfather found out the truth about the tea eggs and gave him a good beating.
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