novelI Want to Make You Stay (70)
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"That's not important now, " he answered in his deep voice."I don't wish for matters of the past to affect your judgment in the present. Do you get what I mean? Even if I love you, I don't wish for you to force yourself to stay by my side if you're unwilling to. That way, you won't be happy, and neither will I. I've already gotten over it."
Fang Erlan watched him speak in such a serious manner and responded, "If you realized this earlier, you shouldn't have disturbed my life at the very beginning. You've already made me like this, and now you're saying this. Don't you think it's too late?"
"How is it too late? It's never too late." He added in a serious tone, "Aren't you marrying Yan Ge soon? I won't cling onto you anymore."
Hearing his words, Fang Erlan actually felt terribly upset.
With her eyes slightly reddened, she gazed at Xiao Chenyang and wrapped her arms around him tightly, bursting into loud wails uncontrollably.
....
When Yan Ge returned at 11:30 pm, he could not find Fang Erlan anywhere in the room.
He thought that Fang Erlan had left, so he gave her a call.
"Erlan, where are you? I don't see you in the room."
With her phone in hand, Fang Erlan's lips twitched slightly as she replied, "I went out for a walk. I'll go back right now."
"Okay."
After hanging up the phone, Fang Erlan said to Xiao Chenyang, "I'm going back to my hotel room."
Seeing how Xiao Chenyang did not reply, she got up and started to leave, but when she was at the door, he spoke.
"I'll be staying here for these few days."
Fang Erlan turned and darted a glance at him before heading back to the room she and Yan Ge had booked.
The room was brightly lit, so there was clearly someone inside.
She entered straight away and saw Yan Ge with his head lowered, looking at his phone.
"It's so late now, where have you been?"
Yan Ge stood up and approached her. Sensing that she seemed to be acting unusual, he probed, "Why are your eyes so red? You cried? And you changed your clothes?"
Fang Erlan put on a forced smile and muttered, "My clothes were wet, so I borrowed these to wear. Yan Ge, let's go back to the hotel."
Yan Ge asked, "It's already so late... let's just stay here for one night and return tomorrow, shall we?"
"No, I want to return to the hotel now." Her voice was not very loud but it was full of power, clearly showing her determination.
Seeing how she insisted on returning, Yan Ge nodded and agreed. They honestly had not spent a good time tonight.
When they got into the car, Fang Erlan remarked as she buckled up her seatbelt, "Not long after you left, Auntie called me."
"My mother?" Yan Ge held onto the steering wheel and turned the car back."What did she say?"
"She thinks that the way I treat my family and you isn't good, so she wants me to break up with you, " she answered simply."Yan Ge, will you break up with me because your parents object strongly to our relationship?"
"I'll convince them." Yan Ge fixed his gaze on her."My mother has a misunderstanding about you, don't take her words to heart."
"What if you aren't able to convince them?" she probed."If your mother is hell-bent on objecting to our relationship, what will you do?"
"What's with you? No matter what, she won't disregard her son's happiness. Moreover, I'm a mature adult. I believe I can handle this matter properly." Yan Ge speculated, "Don't tell me you cried because of her words?"
"It wasn't because of her, it was because of myself." Fang Erlan gazed at him."Yan Ge, do you love me?"
"If I didn't love you, why would I get together with you?"
"How much do you love me?"
"How do I describe it?" After some thought, Yan Ge responded, "I want to marry you and have children with you. I want to be together with you for the rest of my life."
"If I die, will you remarry?"
Yan Ge felt something strange about her and replied, "What rubbish, why will you die?"
"I'm asking you, if I died without giving you any children, would you remarry?" Fang Erlan could already guess the answer, actually."You're the only son in your family, I'm guessing you would, right?"
"I don't wish to answer this question." He simply did not wish to deceive her.
"Do you think there's a man in this world who would stay single for the rest of his life if his wife died without giving him any children, despite being the only son in his family?"
"I think that there may be such a person in this world. However, in this day and age, he would be extremely rare. I think having such a person amongst a million people may even be too difficult."
"That's true. After all, some men would even divorce their wives straight away if they aren't able to give birth. How could there possibly be a person who wouldn't remarry even after his wife died? Rather than say it's for the purpose of carrying on their family name, I would think it's because they don't love their wives deeply enough."
"..."
Yan Ge did not know how to answer her and eventually responded, "But don't you think that if someone dies early, it's very selfish of him or her to expect their partner to live alone'til death? When one dies, the living still needs to move on."
"Love itself is originally a selfish thing."
"Let's change the topic." Yan Ge did not want to continue discussing a topic that seemed meaningless to him.
Fang Erlan did not say anything further. The inner activity in her heart was like a raging torrent.
Seeing her so quiet, Yan Ge said to her, "Don't overthink. You won't die early or be unable to give birth to children."
"How would you know that?"
Yan Ge suddenly stepped on the brakes and stopped the car. Thinking about her unusual behavior tonight and how she said she had cried because of herself, he looked at her seriously and asked, "Are you... sick?"
Fang Erlan was astounded by his question."No."
After heaving a sigh of relief, Yan Ge continued to drive.
Throughout the whole time on the road, Yan Ge had no idea what was on Fang Erlan's mind.
When she returned to the hotel room, Fang Erlan opened a bottle of mineral water and drank more than half of it. After placing the bottle down, she gave An Xiaoning a call.
At this time, An Xiaoning was already asleep but was woken up by her call.
"Ah... Erlan, what is it that you have to tell me at this time of night?" An Xiaoning leaned against the bed and asked her with her eyes still in a daze. Since she was calling her at such a time, there must be something going on.
"Sis Xiaoning, today, Yan Ge brought me to a mansion in the suburbs of B City. I've never been there, but I actually felt that the place was rather familiar, like I had already been there multiple times. We ran into Xiao Chenyang and another girl by a lake inside. Xiao Chenyang said that it's his territory there." Without giving An Xiaoning a chance to cut in, Fang Erlan went on, "Yan Ge's mother used an excuse of feeling lightheaded to call him back to the hotel. His mother then called me and said some nasty things. After that, I felt frustrated so I went out for a walk. At that point, it started to rain, so I bought an umbrella and went to the observation deck. Little did I expect..."
The more An Xiaoning listened on, the more awake she felt."What did you not expect?"
"Many images started surfacing in my head. It was all of Nan Chuang and Xiao Chenyang..." She continued, "I went to find Xiao Chenyang and indirectly confirmed my suspicions. That ancient corpse that you brought back from overseas, the one that Xiao Chenyang brought me to witness being cremated into ashes that were later scattered into the sea, that's me in my past life... Sis Xiaoning, you knew about it long ago, right?"
"Right." Hearing how she had already found out about everything, An Xiaoning had no intention of hiding it from her anymore.
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