novelEven When You're Working in the Study Room, No Good Thought Comes to Mind
| ← Ch.120 | Ch.122 → |
Chapter 121: Even When You're Working in the Study Room, No Good Thought Comes to Mind.
Translator: EndlessFantasy Translation Editor: EndlessFantasy Translation
"I remember it clearly when Beicheng was seven years old and it was almost New Years. She rarely brings Beicheng out to the mall to shop for new clothes, it's always been me. She had never done that before and Beicheng was ecstatic. That small child had never given up on getting his mother's love, even if it's just a little bit it was great. But, do you know what happened? She brought him to the mall and while Beicheng was changing his clothes in the fitting room, she received a call. We already guessed what had happened, she probably got a call from Lu Zhentung and when she went out to receive the call, we don't know what news she received. She was actually so dazed that she left Beicheng inside the mall and forgotten about him."
"When Beicheng finished changing his clothes and went out, he was so elated in showing her whether or not he looked good in them. But, he couldn't find her. The shopkeeper told him that his mother went out to receive a call, Beicheng then waited patiently in the shop. Right until it was closing time for the mall, Jiang Changdai didn't return. Beicheng then went back inside the fitting room as he cried to change his clothes back, he was wearing it the whole time as he waited for Jiang Changdai to return and look at them."
"On that day Beicheng's dad was working late, when he returned at night he noticed that his son wasn't at home, nor was she. He thought that Beicheng was with us at our house and gave us a call, and found out Beicheng hadn't returned. That was when we got anxious and quickly went out looking for him. He was a small child, it was almost New Years and the malls were filled with people. If he... If he met a kidnapper, what would've happened? Beicheng was lucky as he hadn't met one. If he had the consequences would've been unimaginable. At the time I was just—" Old Lady Yan was choked with emotions, "Just hoping those two would get a divorce! Marrying that type of woman, it was the devil's work!"
As Old Lady Yan spoke, tears rolled down her face.
Aunt Chen then brought Yan Ningbai into the bedroom to sleep, these kind of talks were bad for a child to listen to after all.
Yu Zi sat beside Old Lady Yan, she silently reached out a tissue for her.
Old Lady Yan wiped her tears and blew her nose then continued, "The shopkeeper took pity on him and brought him to the police station. The police station then contacted us, only then our hearts were at ease. When Beicheng saw us, he immediately started crying and he was practically wailing. Before that, even when he was upset at something, I've never seen him cry so loud, he was so terrified. For a few days after that incident, he had nightmares. He called out for his father, mother, and his grandparents, shouting for them to not leave him behind and said he wanted to go home."
"It was hard for me to imagine, such a small child all alone in a mall. Looking at people going in and out, but none were his mother coming to get him home. Up until the mall was empty, there was still no one coming to get him. Imagine how scared he was." Old Lady Yan cried as she spoke, "After that incident, Beicheng gave up on Jiang Changdai. He no longer sought her attention."
"Due to his young age, he still carried bits of hope in his heart. But Jiang Changdai was distant towards him, she always carried this look as if she doesn't care about him and was nonchalant towards him. He then no longer had an excessive expectation. When he grew up, his heart completely gave up as well. He'd still address her as 'mom' when he met her, but other than that he won't say anything else. He'd no longer attempt to gain her attention as well. Before Beichang was seven, he'd still ask us whether or not his mother likes him. Whether or not he wasn't doing good enough for her? If he tried harder, would his mother like him a little bit more?"
"We could only comfort him by saying that she would. After he was seven, he no longer asked us such questions. When Beicheng was ten, he already formed his own opinion. Although he was young, he had the boldness of an adult. He was indifferent towards Jiang Changdai, and Jiang Changdai was not pleased by this. She then questioned why Beicheng was so indifferent and did not treat her like a mother. It was up until he was fifteen years old, and the matters after that you already knew."
"I understood Beicheng, it's not that he was unwilling to open up. The truth was it was hard to even reminisce about it, talking about it would be harder. It's as if it's reliving the memory once more." Old Lady Yan sighed.
"Granny, I'm sorry. I just insisted on—"
"Silly child, it's not your fault! You'd find out sooner or later anyway!" Old Lady Yan said.
The two exchanged a couple more words and ended their conversation.
Lin Chu did not dare to go back immediately, not when she was crying like that. When she thought about how Yan Beicheng had suffered such an ordeal when he was young, it became insufferable for her and tears would not stop flowing. She could not go back now and further worry Yan Beicheng.
She then planned to hide in the washroom for a while to wash her face and let her eyes calm down from the redness, then went back.
However, as she opened the door, she ran into Yan Beicheng's arms.
He had put on comfortable home wear, it was blue casual trousers and a white baseball T-shirt. He just finished taking a shower, and a whiff of body wash with a familiar sweet scent hit her nostrils.
Ever since moving in together, the two of them had been using the same bottles of shampoo and body wash. It was the same items, but when used on different people it emitted different kinds of scent. When Yan Beicheng used them, the scent was particularly masculine. She liked it, it was as if it had a stimulating effect that made her go weak in her knees.
The T-shirt he was wearing looked a bit damp, it was obvious he had just gotten out of the shower. The moisture on his body was not completely dried yet, so the water had stuck on his shirt.
His hair was also only rubbed a few times with a towel, it was not blown dry yet. It was half dry now, and the ends were dripping water droplets on his shoulder, making the shoulder area looked damp. It brought out the sweet scent of shampoo that penetrated her nostrils.
Lin Chu did not dare to let Yan Beicheng see her cry, she then lowered her head and did not lift it.
As her whole body was in Yan Beicheng's arm, his voice could clearly be heard from the top of her head."When I got out of the shower I didn't see you around, why are you here?"
Lin Chu shook her head and did not speak a word. If she had she would have been exposed.
Yan Beicheng knew something was up and frowned. His voice tensed up."What happened?"
Lin Chu could not lie to him, she quietly said, "Just now granny called, I think because you abruptly went to the Family Mansion and left, she got worried about us. I picked up her call. Then... Granny told me about your childhood."
She was speaking softly and timidly as if she were a child that had committed a crime and trying to act shyly to an adult.
Yan Beicheng hugged her tightly as he felt a stab in his heart.
"It's all in the past now. Moreover, ever since I was ten I already stopped caring." Yan Beicheng knew that she felt distressed, he then bowed his head down and landed a burning kiss on top of her head.
He just lifted her and sat on the sofa in the study room, and cuddled her right on his lap.
"You don't mind it, but I do. To think you've gone through such an ordeal as a child, it's distressing to me." Lin Chu's voice was muffled.
What kind of horrible mother was that!
"I know, it's the same as when I knew you've suffered in the Lin Family. It's distressing as well, " Yan Beicheng whispered, his voice was elegant, and it was especially soothing when he murmured, "If you don't want me to be sad about your past, I wish you wouldn't be distressed about mine as well. It's all in the past anyway, we can look forward now and treat each other well. If we won't let ourselves wrong each other, and don't let ourselves be wronged by others, that's enough."
Lin Chu nodded, the past could not be changed. Henceforth, they would just work harder together.
She finally lifted her head, her face filled with tears that could not be stopped.
Yan Beicheng was not carrying around handkerchiefs and tissues. He then used his sleeve to wipe off her tears. The T-shirt's material was soft and comfy, he carefully wiped to avoid hurting her delicate skin.
Lin Chu rubbed herself coyly in his embrace, she looked so petite. Along with her long scattered hair that covered his hands that were on her back, it was sweet and pleasant.
This person that was distressed because of him, and currently acting coy in his arms. Yan Beicheng looked at the top of her dark hair and felt an immense amount of adoration. He was itching to pinch her.
Just as he was seeking for her lips, she suddenly lifted her head. She looked up with her weeping little red face, even the rim of her eyes were red. It looked especially endearing and stimulating people to love her dearly. She gave out a pitiful look that made him wanted to merge her into his bones.
The grip of the arms around her could not help but tightened, it made Lin Chu felt somewhat hurt by it. She said nothing of it, as this strength of his gave her a peace of mind.
"Yan Beicheng, in the future I would never do anything to make you sorry nor will I do anything that'd make you sad. No matter what, I'd put you first." Lin Chu blushed, with her tongue somehow twisted, "I'm— Once I'm with you, I'd be faithful till your death and never leave your side!"
Yan Beicheng was speechless, "..."
What was this now and what was the connection?
Yan Beicheng sneered loudly and did not hesitate to put his palm on the top of her head, and proceeded to rub her hair, "There's a tiny being with no conscience, she just told me she'd be faithful till my death and never leave my side. Consequently, she'd forgotten me for 18 years."
Lin Chu was speechless, "..."
She then simply acted coy by rubbing herself in his embrace, she used her head to rub on his soft T-shirt. It was getting a little addictive, her arms tightened around his waist, and she raised her head to nibble on his chin.
"Why are you trying to compete with a six-year-old!" Lin Chu lowered her head and lightly sucked on his faintly prominent Adam's apple. Using her teeth to lightly gnaw, leaving two rows of faint teeth marks on his throat. Perfectly outlining the position of his larynx."I... I'll never forget about you again. You're such a sweetheart, who'd easily forget about you."
Yan Beicheng's throat slid down slightly when being softly teased by her like this. He felt his throat tingling from her teeth love biting on it, her lips that were suctioning on it were moist and glossy and he could not stand the ticklishness. That heart of his was stirred restlessly and ferociously, his below was even more valiant.
He thought about her being distressed because of what he had endured in the past, the core of his heart felt warm all the more. He removed her face from his throat as he scratched the surface where she made it itch the most, and lowered his head to firmly lock with her lips.
Lin Chu was pressed on by him on the sofa, as she felt his hand coming into her clothes and slowly moving up. She thought few kisses was all there was, but when his thin lips had begun to kiss downwards, the situation was getting fishy.
Lin Chu grabbed onto his shoulders."It's still daylight!"
"We have nothing to do anyway." Yan Beicheng muttered while he pulled down her shirt collar.
Lin Chu was speechless, "..."
If there was nothing to do, should they be doing this then?
"Please, I really want you right now." Yan Beicheng held her tightly, afraid she would seize the opportunity to flee. He lifted his head from her collarbone, the pupils of his eyes ignited brightly as he drew across her entire face with his gaze.
Her subtle facial features were in no way unattractive to him, the slight redness of her face and her foggy eyes made his throat tighten up.
"About yesterday's fight, and this morning when I left without a word. I know I scared you, I'm sorry. It won't happen again." He hugged her tightly, his face filled with love and care for her and it made her understood his current emotions.
He wanted to make up for yesterday's and this morning's matter and wanted to have her tightly near him.
She wanted the same.
Lin Chu blushed, using her slim and soft naked toe to gently rub on the back of his foot."Close the door."
He was busy carrying her inside that he had forgotten to close the door.
Yan Beicheng wanted to latch on to her and never let go, he refused to get up.
Lin Chu simply kicked his foot once."Go and close the door! What if Aunt Zhuang comes up?"
Yan Beicheng took a deep breath and sucked her lips ferociously before getting up to close the door, then locked it. He came back and lay on top of her again."The study room gives out a different feeling."
Lin Chu then used her fist to hit him once lightly and played along with him. He did his moves on her step by step, and just when he was about to drop the anchor and go in, Lin Chu suddenly stopped him saying, "Wait a minute, where's the umbrella 1?"
Yan Beicheng was stunned, 'the umbrella' was the term Lin Chu would use when she was too embarrassed to say the actual word.
He gritted his teeth, this time he took an even deeper breath. He fiercely bit on her lips and even the eyes were already red."Is this on purpose?"
"..." Lin Chu shrunk her neck. Even though it was not on purpose, tossing and turning this way and ultimately blocking him at the last moment, unable to enter. It must have been torture."It's not intentional, go quickly and get it."
Yan Beicheng was agitated and speechless, he really had no idea how to deal with her."What else do you need, say it all out at once."
"Nothing else, " Lin Chu replied immediately. She did not dare to ask for more, not that there was anything else to ask for anyway.
Looking at his handsome face that went stiff from the endurance, Lin Chu felt apologetic. She looked up and held his face, started kissing him on his soft thin lips, "I'm really sorry, when you return... I'm going to make it up to you!"
Yan Beicheng raised his eyebrows and smirked elatedly."You said it yourself."
After that, he got up in a flash. Lin Chu noticed that he did not put on his clothes and did not go out of the room. Instead, he went to the desk and pulled out a drawer to take out a box of Durex.
"..." Lin Chu was speechless as she looked at him."Why do you have that in here?"
"For convenience purposes, I put them in the bedroom, study room, bathroom, as long as it's a place where we'd be alone, I've prepared it. To save time from walking far to get them." Yan Beicheng pinched on the umbrella proudly."See, it came in handy today."
Lin Chu suddenly bit on his shoulder, "Even when you're working in the study room, no good thought comes to mind."
"How's this not a good thought?" Yan Beicheng slid it on him, spread her door open and went inside.
...
Cheng Ziming arrived at where Lin Chu and Xu Moyan rented their house initially. He leaned against the wall but did not ring the doorbell.
He had no idea what he was doing there. According to Xu Moyan, Lin Chu had moved out and she was currently living with Yan Beicheng. He did not know Yan Beicheng's address, and somehow, ended up going there unconsciously.
After an unpleasant conversation with Xu Moyan, he did not knock on the door. It was not due to fear or awkwardness, it was an unexplainable emotion.
He did not want to meet Lin Chu as well. If they met up, Lin Chu only held resentment towards him. Hence, he had no idea what he was doing there.
He suddenly reminisced the times when Lin Chu and he were together?
The time when he was dating Lin Yuwen behind Lin Chu's back, he would occasionally think about her. He would have come to look for her for a few days in a month, met up with her and went on dates. Perhaps he had no intention to break up with Lin Chu, even though ultimately he would marry Lin Yuwen. He was dragging on the break-up one day at a time.
He just did not realize it. When he thought back to those days, he found out that he was reluctant to let Lin Chu go.
When he was with Lin Chu, it was the most calming and worry-free moment for him. There was no sullied interests in mind, just pure simple love.
Right now, he missed that calmness he had back then. It was just that now he had made his choice, he could only move forward with his decision.
Ever since Lin Yuwen was discharged, the household had been a mess.
Chu Tian Hospital also ran out of methods and concluded that she would not be able to give birth anymore. Lin Zhenghe was already inquiring about the possibility of IVF, if that was not possible, then they would find a surrogate.
Wang Jinglin had been crying at home every day, and every time he went back Wang Jinglin would be nagging in his ears about Lin Yuwen not being able to produce an heir now, what should they do? She would pester him about whether a solution had been found, and about the possibility of the Old Cheng Family not having an heir. If he brought Lin Yuwen back home, Wang Jinglin would be able to hold herself back from asking, but not long after she started harping on the topic in front of Lin Yuwen. Now Lin Yuwen felt only annoyance, and refused to give in to Wang Jinglin and talked back to her gracelessly.
Lin Yuwen had been holding on to her identity all along, she knew in her heart she was never able to stand up to Wang Jinglin and Cheng Jindong. It was just that previously Wang Jinglin was gentle and was gracious towards her, so Lin Yuwen gave her the proper filial piety.
Currently, due to the issue of not being able to give birth, Wang Jinglin thought Lin Yuwen was no longer a complete woman. So what if she was rich? Even if she were rich she was no longer a match for her son, her attitude slowly changed as well.
The two's disagreements then deepened from there onwards.
When Lin Yuwen was rude towards her, Wang Jinglin would cry and put on a look as if she had been wronged. Cheng Ziming could only ask for Lin Yuwen to endure, let Wang Jinglin ramble on and forget about it. But Lin Yuwen was also in her most sensitive and paranoid period, not being able to give birth to an heir, she was afraid Cheng Ziming would be disloyal to her.
When Cheng Ziming was kind and understanding towards her, she assumed that Cheng Ziming was only doing so because of Lin Mao. If she no longer served a purpose to Cheng Ziming, they would have divorced long ago. When Cheng Ziming was annoyed by the way she argued, she would assume Cheng Ziming had no affection towards her anymore and it played a big part on why she was unable to conceive. Ultimately, every dissatisfaction thus far would come out.
Anything that was said would come out wrongly if Cheng Ziming advised Lin Yuwen to not butt heads with Wang Jinglin. Lin Yuwen would refute by saying the Cheng Family no longer respected her, and it was because she could no longer conceive.
Due to Lin Yuwen's erratic temperament causing Cheng Ziming to be both mentally and physically exhausted, he no longer loved being at home. Every day he arranged for his schedule to have either overtime or entertainment. Precisely due to this, when he went back late, Lin Yuwen would then assume Cheng Ziming was outside being a womanizer, thus causing more violent arguments.
Once Lin Yuwen's body had recovered and she went back to work, she started to observe Cheng Ziming closely. Just last week when she saw Cheng Ziming talking to a female staff, the female staff giggled from a joke. Lin Yuwen then assumed Cheng Ziming had hooked up with the female staff and found an excuse to dismiss her.
Cheng Ziming was furious, but he was unable to get angry with Lin Yuwen. Lin Zhenghe and Su Changxin were also constantly keeping a close eye on him, for fear that he would cause grievance to Lin Yuwen.
He was so vexed and tired now and felt there was nothing to strive for in his daily life. When he went to the company he would see Lin Yuwen's distrusting face, and he would see the same appearance if he went home. He had no idea what to say to make Lin Yuwen happy.
If he spoke nicely to coax her, Lin Yuwen would say that he was just giving out a flowery speech and it was insincere. If he spoke nothing, Lin Yuwen would presume his heart no longer cared for her existence, and would not even speak a word to him.
The days were almost impossible to live through, it gave him a headache just thinking about it.
He now wondered about the efforts he had given, and the sacrifices he had made, whether or not it was worth it.
The company was not even in his grasp yet, but having a child was surely no longer on the table.
| ← Ch. 120 | Ch. 122 → |