novelTell Me What I Did Wrong And Give Me A Chance To Make Amends (Beicheng Revealed To Lin Chu That He Was The Older Boy From Back Then)
| ← Ch.116 | Ch.118 → |
Chapter 117: Tell Me What I Did Wrong And Give Me A Chance To Make Amends (Beicheng Revealed To Lin Chu That He Was The Older Boy From Back Then)
Yan Beicheng's face abruptly sank. His cold, black irises darkened, slowly turning bloodshot with anger."Miss Lu, we aren't that close. I don't remember anyone taking me to your house when I was little."
Those memories were degrading to him; he did not want to even think about them at all.
He might be willing to call her his mother, but it was about where his courtesy extended to.
If someone thought that mentioning Jiang Changdai would appeal themselves to him, then they were sorely mistaken; it only served to disgust him even more.
Yan Beicheng was livid. He did not show any sign of emotional turmoil, but everyone could see that his expression was one of disgust and fury.
Lin Chu had not seen Yan Beicheng exhibit fury of this degree before. He was always a man of self-discipline, his calm, controlled facade only broke when it came to her, either due to nervousness or worry. Those were the only times when his face showed any semblance of emotion. He would cease to conceal his true personality, too, when he was with Chu Zhaoyang and the others. Besides that, she had never seen his facade crack.
She was not nervous in the slightest, though, not when the threat was not directed towards her.
Lu Weining froze with shock. She blinked, not daring to look Yan Beicheng in the eyes.
A thought crossed her mind, and she licked her lips uneasily."I said the wrong thing."
Yan Beicheng crooked his mouth derisively, face stony.
Lu Weining looked desolate. She smiled ruefully, "Beicheng, I —"
"Miss Lu." Yan Beicheng interrupted her.
Lu Weining's smile betrayed her misery. She called him Beicheng, yet he responded with a cold "Miss Lu"; anyone could hear the difference of their intentions.
Yan Beicheng did not voice his thoughts, but it was evident from what he called her — the two of them were not that close, thus there was no need for her to call him in such an affectionate manner.
Lu Weining stared at Yan Beicheng wistfully, her gaze wanton and pleading, completely disregarding Lin Chu's presence. Lin Chu wanted badly to slap her in the face at the sight of the woman seducing her man right in front of her. Does the woman have any sense of dignity at all?
Yan Beicheng seemed to not understand the message her gaze was trying to convey. He stood up."I'm not going to see you out."
Lu Weining, "..."
Her spotless and slightly long fingernails, pretty and exquisite after the manicure she did specially for this occasion, dug deeply into the flesh of her palm, but she felt no pain. She did not expect Yan Beicheng to completely shed any pretense of courtesy when he ordered her to leave, not even bothering with empty platitudes, while completely blind to her feelings for him.
She remembered the words she had said to Lin Chu before Yan Beicheng returned. Her actions then were now laughable after Yan Beicheng had rejected her advances.
Aunt Zhuang appeared without her noticing in front of the doors, with her coat draped on one arm and her handbag carried by the other, looking like she could not wait for her to leave.
Lu Weining gritted her teeth, holding tight to the shreds of her dignity, and nodded towards Lin Chu."Miss Lin, we'll meet when the time comes."
Lin Chu nodded in response and did not say anything else.
Lu Weining glanced at Yan Beicheng once again, her reluctance to yield somewhat evident in her eyes, before she took her coat and bag from Aunt Zhuang. She still held her head high when she walked out of the door; she did not allow herself to show an ounce of vulnerability.
Lin Chu admired her for that.
After Lu Weining had left, she took out her phone."Auntie."
...
After the doors were closed, Lin Chu gave Yan Beicheng the side-eye. Her expression, which was gentle and serene in Lu Weining's presence, cooled rapidly. She 'hmphed' and walked upstairs, leaving Yan Beicheng alone.
"..." Yan Beicheng called at Lin Chu's retreating back, "I'm still a little dizzy, so I want to drink a little bit more of that."
He did not get a reply.
Aunt Zhuang returned after seeing Lu Weining out. She looked at Yan Beicheng, who in turn met her eyes.
She 'tsked' twice and went back to the kitchen to clean up.
Yan Beicheng, "..."
He returned to the bedroom and saw Lin Chu sitting on the bed, back against the headboard and bolster in her arms. She was holding her phone, presumably in the middle of a text conversation with Xu Moyan.
Yan Beicheng scooted over. He got a hold of her waist and pulled the woman into his arms.
Lin Chu straight up kicked him on his long legs and glared at him coldly and 'hmphed' before getting out from below his arm and settling on the sofa instead.
"..." Yan Beicheng did not get to look at her conversation with Xu Moyan. He followed wordlessly and draped himself over Lin Chu, arms enveloping her waist.
Having learned a lesson from his previous attempt, he did not let go, holding Lin Chu tightly even when she tried her hardest to extricate herself from his arms. Lin Chu locked her phone and put it on the side table. She said to Yan Beicheng unceremoniously, "Let go. I'm annoyed at you now."
"..." Yan Beicheng put Lin Chu down on his lap expressionlessly and contained her in his arms."What did I do to annoy you?" The prolonged, slightly cotton-candy-soft words, words betraying his bashfulness, were said in that low voice of his.
Lin Chu gritted her teeth and stomped on his slippered foot with hers — this man still had the nerve to act all vulnerable in front of her when he was out there hitting on girls left and right.
She also wore fluffy slippers, so her stomp did not hurt.
"Why the sudden temper?" Yan Beicheng held her tight, "What's wrong? If I did something wrong and annoyed you, you have to tell me so that I'll know. If you fume over it alone and not tell me, I won't know how I can change for the better. Fuming doesn't feel good, does it."
Lin Chu, "..."
Listening to his words, she was suddenly no longer angry...
She had known that all that was one-sided in Lu Weining's part, and Yan Beicheng giving her the cold shoulder in a way that left no argument and hurt her dignity backed up that statement. She knew, objectively, that this was not on Yan Beicheng, but Lu Weining's words roused negative feelings in her that she could not help venting on Yan Beicheng.
"Come on, tell me and give me a chance to make amends." Yan Beicheng's attitude was an apologetic one; he had determined that whatever Lin Chu says was right and that everything was his mistakes that he would need to rectify.
"..." When faced with his contrite attitude, Lin Chu found it hard to keep her face stony. She was still annoyed, but her tone softened by a lot compared to a moment ago. She said, "The two of you were nearly engaged, huh."
"Who?" Yan Beicheng asked innocently.
"Try that again?" Lin Chu raised her brow and said from behind gritted teeth.
Her hostile gaze conveyed a message: "You try that again, and I'll let you have a taste of the consequences."
"..." Yan Beicheng nuzzled in the crook of Lin Chu's neck."Are you talking about Lu Weining?"
Lin Chu breathed out shortly. Sensing that her anger had subsided, Yan Beicheng held her earlobe between his slender fingers and pinched it, feather-light, whenever he felt like it until it flushed hot between his fingertips and her ire subsided.
"My father died when I was fifteen. Before that, my... mother —" Yan Beicheng's lips pursed into a thin, hard line. He paused for a while before continuing, "Wished me to be engaged to her, but then my grandparents and father all said that I was too young for marriage and that I would have my own agenda when I grew older, so I should have my own say over my marriage. She mentioned this a few times later, but my grandparents would always reject it."
The "she" in the last sentence must have referred to his mother, Lin Chu guessed.
"I did not meet with Lu Weining often, only at a few important occasions at the most. We would only introduce ourselves to each other and exchange a few sentences. To be honest, I've already forgotten what she looked like, " Yan Beicheng said and snorted derisively.
Lin Chu looked up slowly and asked, "Is she the woman in the paparazzi photos from that time in Ning City?"
"Mm. My mother lives with her parents in Ning City. I was there for business, and it was only appropriate to visit when I'm in their territory. We had dinner together, but I didn't expect her to invite Lu Weining's father. She was there too." A corner of Yan Beicheng's mouth pulled up in derision."I don't know which one of them called the paparazzi though."
Lin Chu looked down, her thick eyelashes concealing her gaze.
She remembered Yan Beicheng telling her that he visited his elders just as an afterthought.
She did not know how his relationship with his mother was like. When he had mentioned her then, he paused before continuing, his reluctance in the subject evident. She now understood why he had told her that he was visiting his elders, but not his mother; he did not like mentioning her.
She recalled that he had only mentioned his grandparents, Yan Huaian's family, and his deceased father when he had talked about family, his mother being omitted.
The reason he loathed to talk about his mother while she was still alive all this time was the estranged relationship between him and her.
"The Aunt Jiang that Lu Weining mentioned just now—" Lin Chu was interrupted by Yan Beicheng.
"I'm taking you to see a place, " Yan Beicheng said while he pulled her up."Go change."
He walked out of the bedroom.
Lin Chu opened her mouth to say something, but he was already gone.
She sighed, from an emotion that she struggled to articulate but knew was definitely not good.
He had something in his mind but did not want to confide in her.
It was arguably a private affair of his own, so him not wanting to talk about it was perfectly reasonable, but she felt their relationship had reached a stage where there was no need for secrecy.
He knew everything about her, but she realized that she did not know a great deal about him.
He had told her that she was the only woman he wanted to marry, and she reciprocated the sentiment. When the two of them were playing the long game, her getting to know everything about him was important.
She would not pester him, but it did not mean that she should let him hold all his secrets to himself instead of telling her.
Today's incident made her realize that he really did not have the intention.
Lu Weining knowing something that she did not was the last straw. That made her feel like she was out of the loop.
Maybe that was the part bothered her most.
She did not notice the footsteps approaching, immersed in her pensive thoughts until a pair of black-socked, slippered feet appeared in her line of sight. The hem of his slacks fell on his pretty feet.
Only then did she realize that Yan Beicheng was back. Surprised, she looked up, only to see a photograph, the paper yellowed with age.
The subject of the image was all but unfamiliar.
Wasn't the girl sitting in the boy's lap her?
The teen behind the girl was also vaguely familiar. Pieces of her memories flowed back into shape, and the previously blurry silhouette of the teen took shape in his mind.
She was too little, and many years had passed since then, so she was a little unclear on how the teen looked like, but she remembered everything when she saw the photo.
"You —" Lin Chu's mouth opened wide with overwhelming surprise.
She looked at the photo, and then at Yan Beicheng, eyes filled with astonishment.
Now that she looked at the photo attentively, she discovered that Yan Beicheng really did bear a striking resemblance to the teen in the photo, the only disparities between then and now being the maturity in his features his age had gifted him and the lines time had carved on his face, which had long been rid of the youthfulness and freshness that defined his teenage years.
He had been all collagen-filled cheeks and gentle smiles and disarming charm. Now that was replaced by knife-sharp edges and defined, handsome features.
She failed to reconcile Yan Beicheng to the older boy when she met him only because she had mostly forgotten how he had looked like.
She definitely would have identified him if she had remembered.
"I was fifteen, and my father's death hit me hard. I had felt, then, that my entire world was in shambles, and everything was bleak. My family was worried about me, and someone was always beside me in any time of the day." Yan Beicheng smiled gently.
He pulled the closet doors open, took out a coat for Lin Chu to wear, and led her, who had not yet recovered from the shock, outside.
When they went down the stairs, Aunt Zhuang had already finished cleaning up the kitchen and was applying a mask of green, thick goop on her face.
"Sir?" Aunt Zhuang looked at them with surprise; it seemed like they were planning to go out.
Lin Chu was still wearing her loungewear.
"We're going out for a while. You don't need to wait up for us, " Yan Beicheng said, and he pulled Lin Chu outside.
He continued after they were both out of the door."Yan Huaian was in university by then. When he did not have school, he would come to look for me in Jixia Academy. When I visited the family home, my grandparents would also accompany me, in fear that my mind would wander to unhappy places when I was alone. They would also rack their brains for jokes to tell me; my grandpa never went anywhere without a book of jokes in his hands so that he could label those he thought were funny and recite them to me someday. Grandma searched for comedy shows and snippets on TV and recorded them for me."
Yan Beicheng softened when he brought up the concern his family showed him."They went a little overboard, though. Sometimes I yearned for peace and quiet alone. I was quite stressed then, what with someone always beside me, scrutinizing me for signs of weakness and reaching the worst conclusions when anything was amiss, as if I was a fragile glass ball prone to shatter."
"So I snuck away one time in search of a place where I can hide for a while. I wandered into the orphanage, and then I met you."
Lin Chu forgot about asking him about his mother as he listened to his words.
They chatted throughout the entire journey, and the car stopped in a sudden halt.
Yan Beicheng pulled Lin Chu down from the car, and she came to her senses when the frigid wind blew on her face. Only then did she discover that they had arrived in front of the orphanage.
"I don't have the keys to the orphanage, and it's too late now, " Lin Chu said, not wanting to wake the old principal.
"We'll leave after a while, so we don't need to call the old principal, " Yan Beicheng said as he held Lin Chu's hand and walked to the back of the orphanage.
The tall, broad pagoda tree was visible from the low walls. The relics that the two of them had buried were underneath it.
She was adopted by the Lin family not long after they had buried them, so they were still there till this day. The two of them had no idea of what the other had buried.
When she was focused on the tree, someone dashed frontwards from the side. She turned her gaze at the silhouette and realized that it was Yan Beicheng. He stepped on the wall and his arms caught onto the top of it, supporting his body as he clambered up the wall easily.
She looked on as he squatted on the wall, deep in thought, and jumped down. He patted his hands clean from dust and said to Lin Chu, "I'm lifting you up."
Lin Chu looked at the high walls, and then at him.
"I'll protect you. You won't get hurt." Yan Beicheng pinched the side of her waist lightly.
Lin Chu flushed slightly. Luckily, the lighting in the area was dim, and her blush was not obvious in the darkness.
It felt quite exhilarating, the feeling of committing bad deeds secretly. She felt like she was transported to the past when she was naughty and disobedient.
Despite how she was now, she used to frustrate the old principal to no end with her mischief.
The night was cold. She rubbed her hands together and said decisively, "Come on!"
Yan Beicheng chuckled. His hands grasped her waist and raised her up.
Lin Chu was quite capable, too, at utilizing her arms and legs to clamber up the wall, although Yan Beicheng bore the brunt of her weight and spared her most of the effort.
Until she clambered up the wall, Yan Beicheng said, "Wait there. Don't jump down first."
And then she looked on as Yan Beicheng leaped effortlessly onto the wall and into the yard.
He clapped his hands together and extended his arms towards Lin Chu."Jump. I'm here for you."
Lin Chu did not hesitate this time, jumping down as soon as Yan Beicheng spoke into his arms and his tight embrace.
Yan Beicheng laughed softly and kissed her cool forehead."You have to hesitate for a while. Why did you just leap down after I said so? Aren't you afraid?"
"You said that you'll catch me. What is there to fear?" Lin Chu looked up. Her expression suggested that trusting him went without saying, and her clear, huge eyes shone with trust.
It warmed up Yan Beicheng's heart in this frigid night. As she raised her head to look at him, he quickly swallowed her lips with his.
Lin Chu was finally let go after a long time, her face burning. She asked softly, "Do you want to unearth what we buried here?"'
Lin Chu still thought fate to be joyfully mysterious.
How was it possible that Yan Beicheng was the older boy she had met when she was little?
And she was even dating him. This was something she would have never imagined when she was a child.
From the moment she was adopted by the Lin family and lost contact with the older boy, she had no longer held out hope that she could meet him again.
Still, when she hid in her room after a beating by Su Changxin, she would reminisce about her time in the orphanage. The memories she revisited the most were those of her playing with the older boy.
She was the happiest back then.
Every time when she cried or felt unhappy, she would think of those moments and convince herself that the older boy would definitely cheer for her, although he was not with her. She dared not conjure up the old principal's loving visage, as her tears always came more freely with the thought of her. She was only able to think of the older boy's smile.
She pulled herself through with the thought of her going to look for the older boy sometime in the future, and of the anxiety the older boy must have felt when she had suddenly disappeared. She had only managed to survive in the Lin family with those thoughts supporting her. She did not expect, though, to reunite with and become lovers with the boy some ten years later, as the gears of fate spun.
The boy had seemed so much older when they played together in the past. He was like an adult in her eyes, so she had definitely never thought of dating him.
| ← Ch. 116 | Ch. 118 → |