novelAmnesiac Ritzhard
| ← Ch.103 | Ch.105 → |
Author:
Sieglinde's point of view.
Today, I will be making linen with the village women.
I will be away from the house the whole day.
A year and eight months old now, my son was left to father-in-law. He is not inhibited, same as my husband, so there shouldn't be a problem.
Father-in-law, who likes children, gleefully started chatting to my son, asking what he would like to play.
Mother was full of energy to make berry jam from the morning. It seems that she was going to bake pie was well, and she seems to look forward to it.
My husband Ritzhard said that he will be doing maintenance of the sheds.
I told him to not hurt himself.
"Then, I'll be off."
"Sieg, you be careful too!"
It's probably only my husband that says such things to me.
My family, my parents had once said, "Even if you meet a criminal, go easy on them." I think there's a limit to being rude.
"Then, Sieg, a farewell kiss."
"Ha?"
"It's just fine to have it on the cheek."
My husband pointed his cheek towards me.
This is outdoors, and mother-in-law had been going back and forth.
It would be embarrassing if we were to be seen. Thinking that, I pushed my husband's body back.
When I furtively glanced at him, he had his hand to his mouth as he wore an expression of shock.
"Sieglinde, how come......"
"There are others outdoors."
"I don't mind though."
"I do."
"Alright."
He looked dejected, but he seems to have accepted it.
"I like Sieg's tough side as well."
He said something strange, but I ignored it.
I patted his shoulder telling him to take care of the house and then I went out.
When I stared up at the sky, a clear blue sky was spread over me.
The colour was like the beautiful shade of my husband's eyes.
◇◇◇
In the evening, I was returning home after work.
I had received chickpeas from Aina, so I was walking home while thinking if I should use them for soup tomorrow, but ——
"Linde-cha~~n."
Mother-in-law was running over here.
Just what happened? I also walked over quickly.
"Mother-in-law, what happened?"
"U-Un, y-you see~, erm, big trouble~~"
Even as she did not sound as though she was in peril, I carefully listened.
"Ritchan, Ritchan fell off the ladder!"
"What!"
"He was just scratched a little, no big injuries, but, "
I felt relieved that there were no grave injuries.
However, at the next phrase mother-in-law said, I was aghast.
"It seems like Ritchan lost his memory from getting hit in the head~~"
"!?"
I dropped the chickpeas in my hand.
That can't be, for my husband to lose his memory......
For now, father-in-law judged that it would be best to not cause a fuss. It was decided that we will keep quiet about it to the village.
We also decided that we will not provide unnecessary information.
Father-in-law is to act as a doctor, while mother-in-law is to act as a friendly neighbour lady.
Since there will be confusion if my son meets his father who lost his memory, Aina and Emmerich are taking care of them.
What an unbelievable situation, I thought and stared up at the sky.
Seeing me like that, mother-in-law gently patted my back.
"Linde-chan, it's okay. Ritchan will definitely remember."
"......Yes, i-indeed."
I realised something after talking that much.
Would it not be better if I didn't return home?
"Linde-chan, please stay with Ritchan."
"What should I say......"
"Linde-chan, I think you can stay as Linde-chan."
That is...... rather troubling.
Just what should I do?
However, my husband must be troubled too, since he doesn't have any memories. So I might be able to console him at the least.
I returned home after making up my mind.
I went back with an expression of nervousness, but there was father-in-law, relaxed as always.
"Sieglinde-san, welcome ba~ck."
"......I'm back."
"It was a little hot today eh~"
"......Yes, indeed."
Seeing the ever unchanging behaviour of father-in-law, I felt exasperated.
His only son lost his memory. How carefree, I thought.
However, thanks to him, my fluttering heart calmed down.
I breathed deeply and shifted my mood so that I could act normally.
With the berry juice I received from mother-in-law, I headed for my husband's bedroom.
◇◇◇
When I knocked on the door, a reply came back quickly.
"Yes! Please come in!"
It was an unexpectedly bright voice. I started suspecting if he really did lose his memory.
When I opened the door, I saw my husband leaning against the bed. He had a book in his hands.
"Huh, you are——?"
"I am......"
I then thought that I should have made up a story. I was at a loss for words.
Seeing my husband look at me interestedly, I really felt that he did indeed lose his memory.
"Could you be a lady Richelle-obasan knows?"
"Well, that's, about it."
Surprisingly, I was shocked at the fact that my husband did not remember me.
Uncharacteristic of myself, my fingers started trembling.
Suddenly, I thought of my husband's dejected expression in the morning.
Why did I reject that simple kiss.
Such simple greetings, anyone can do that. Back then, I couldn't do it because of embarrassment.
I felt deep regret, that I should have kissed him and went off with smiles.
"What's wrong?"
"N-Nothing......"
I noticed that I had been standing awkwardly at the door with the berry juice in my hand.
I quickly approached and gave him a cup of juice.
"Thank you——. Waa, you!"
"W-What is it?"
"I think you have strong and clear eyes."
"......"
I recalled my husband telling me that he fell in love with at first sight.
Since he was saying the same thing even after he lost his memory, I ended up chuckling.
"Ah, eh? Did I say something weird?"
"No, nothing of the sort."
I felt relieved after talking with him.
Even after he lost his memory, my husband was the same.
"Erm, may I have your name?"
I stared up at the ceiling.
I felt a pain in my chest.
"Sieglinde."
When I answered so, he asked me how he should call me.
"You can call me, whatever you'd like."
"Then, Sieglinde-san."
The current situation is different from when we first met.
Back then, we were talking with marriage as a premise. Thus, he wasn't calling me by a nickname this time.
"I certainly don't seem to have memories......"
"Apparently."
"I may cause inconveniences."
"Yeah."
It's alright, don't worry.
That was what I was thinking, but tears welled up in my eyes.
◇◇◇
Since there were no injuries, from the next day, my husband...... Ritzhard went back to working.
He doesn't have memories, but it seems that the snow country life was embedded into his body.
He woke up early, took care of reindeer and dogs, and chopped wood until it was time for breakfast.
He greeted the Rango family in a refreshing manner as well.
Surprisingly, it was the usual Ritzhard.
I continued to him.
I felt that there won't be a problem if I was with my son Arno, so I greeted him.
It was fortunate that he couldn't say 'dad' yet.
Arno was calling me 'mum' so I introduced Arno as my son to Ritzhard.
"Ah, Sieglinde-san, so you were married."
Upon hearing that, I felt sad.
I told myself that I could only place away my feelings for now.
Ritzhard doted on Arno all the time.
I felt relieved at seeing that.
Even after he lost his memory, daily was surprisingly the same.
The difference was that Ritzhard and I were not couples but strangers.
We told him that I was a widow raising my son on my own.
It really was a sad lie.
A quack doctor, a neighbouring lady, a widow and her son. In addition, a martial race family.
Ritzhard did not seem to be suspicious of this strange cohabitation.
He was bright as usual.
However, I was going mad.
I'm right next to him, but I am not able to act like we did. It was suffocating.
I don't know how many times I retracted my hands as they reached for his innocent smile.
Since Ritzhard always reached out first, I realised that I had never felt lonely before.
Not knowing my feelings, Ritzhard said something very cruel.
"Sieglinde-san is a very diligent and pretty person. Your husband must have been the happiest person in the world."
Hearing that, my chest tightened in pain.
I wonder if this will continue on, when I thought that, the pain grew stronger.
As Ritzhard smiled serenely, I turned my back on him.
I didn't know what I should say to him.
◇◇◇
A month passed since Ritzhard lost his memory.
We managed to keep this a secret from the villagers and continued living quietly.
I headed to the village to make linen.
Everyone chatted as they spun thread.
Today, talking about family was painful.
I ended up making Aina, the only other person who knew, worry.
When I returned home, the house was silent.
In front of the door, there was a note from my parents-in-law that they're on a stroll with Arno.
I wonder if Ritzhard is home?
I peeked into the living room. Then, I saw the figure of Ritzhard sleeping on a chair——
Even when I entered the room, he did not stir.
I sat down next to him.
I thought again as I stared at his profile.
I love Ritzhard.
I reached out to his silver-white hair.
It was fluffy and felt nice to the touch.
It felt like I was touching it after eons, that I felt very happy.
I wanted to enjoy it fully, but since it would be if he woke I quickly retracted my hand.
Before, because Ritzhard's affection was too embarrassing, I ended up rejecting it quite a few times.
Why did I do that, regret washed over me.
There's Arno and Ritzhard, and my parents-in-law are healthy —— I was leading a life that did not lack anything.
However, I felt empty.
How wretched. I felt ashamed at myself for these womanly feelings.
If this is a dream, I wish for it to end quickly.
Suddenly, I had a stupid thought.
In fairytales, kisses undo curses.
If I kiss Ritzhard on the cheek, won't his memory come back, I thought as I carefully approached.
I was moving slowly, but the chair creaked.
However, Ritzhard did not stir.
I approached my lips to his cheek.
The moment they were about to touch——
"No, Sieglinde-san."
Ritzhard said as he still had his eyes closed. I was frightened.
Unmoving from his posture, he opened his eyelids.
An awkward silence enveloped us.
I couldn't stand it, so I spoke up.
"Since when were you awake?"
"Ever since Sieglinde-san came into the room."
"That's from the beginning."
I never knew he was good at feigning sleep. Should I feel happy at this new discovery? I felt confused.
As I agonised over how I should make up an excuse, Ritzhard spoke to me.
"Even so, Sieglinde-san is awful."
"I apologise for touching you selfishly. For, trying to kiss you."
"That's not it."
He approached me and pressed my waist down with his weight. I couldn't move.
Anyway, what does he mean by "That's not it"......?
"You don't know? Why I'm angry?"
"......Yes."
"I won't let you go until you answer me."
"......"
Why is Ritzhard coming on me so severely.
He is usually soft and does not act like this. Because of that, I ended up panicking.
"What should I do. If you don't know, should I punish you?"
"......"
What punishment would he deliver. I couldn't even imagine.
However, I was resigned to my fate.
I am in the wrong.
"I'm sorry."
"You're awful."
"I won't ask you to forgive me."
"Of course. Because, I feel that Sieglinde-san, you see your husband in me."
"Eh?"
"In your eyes, I am not reflected. It feels as though you are looking at someone else."
"Ritzhard, what are you talking about......?"
"I wonder if you still love your former husband? You're approaching to satisfy your own emotions."
Then, I could guess why he was angry.
Ritzhard was jealous. At himself, before he lost his memory.
I felt relieved for some reason, and felt exhausted.
Before I realised it, tears were rolling down my face.
Seeing that, Ritzhard was aghast.
"Ah, uwa, Sieglinde-san, I'm sorry! I-I didn't mean to make you cry——"
His grip loosened and he sat down.
Sitting next to me, Ritzhard could not do anything else but panic.
After calming down, I slowly spoke to Ritzhard.
"......So, you, love me."
When I asked that, he nodded in confirmation.
I'm glad. Really.
We can live like we always had.
While I was feeling relieved, my parents-in-law hurriedly came back into the living room.
"Welcome back."
Ritzhard greeted my parents-in-law and reached out for Arno.
"Arno, welcome back!"
"I'm back, da......d"
"Eh?"
Ritzhard sounded surprised upon hearing Arno.
After that, he turned around to me.
"Uwa, Sieg, did you hear, he just called me dad! Yay~~! ......Ah."
As he lifted Arno high into the air, Ritzhard made an awkward expression.
"What's wrong?"
"Eh~ erm. I remembered everything."
The moment I heard that, a warm feeling ran through my cheeks.
I unconsciously murmured, I'm happy.
"Sieg, sorry...... father, mother, too."
Ritzhard apologised sheepishly. Certainly, he got his memories back.
◇◇◇
"I, really was in pain——"
Sitting next to me, Ritzhard recounted about the time when he had lost his memory.
"Sieg was extremely cute and kind, so I fell in love again, but you said that you were a widow and didn't look at me!"
Even when he had lost his memory, he still liked me. I never noticed.
"Please like me~~ I sent such gazes, but you merely smiled troublingly, so~~"
"I see."
I would have never guessed.
We were each others' unrequited love.
"When I was pretending to be asleep, I was doing it out of hope that I might be approached. I was happy, but I felt that it wasn't what I wanted...... but I thought it might be nice after all, but it didn't feel good in the end——"
While talking, I reached out for Ritzhard.
When I stroked his hair, he closed his eyes delightedly.
It was a blessing that such a meeting existed.
I went around and kissed him on the cheek.
"Fufu, " Ritzhard laughed strangely.
"What?"
"No, Sieg fawning over me, is very cute."
"......What was that?"
"You're the cutest in the world!"
After saying that, he hugged me.
He kept whispering words of love into my ear, so I felt helpless from the embarrassment.
Indeed, his affection is overly embarrassing, but as there is no second time for the time we spend together, I decided to continue cherishing it.
— The End —
| ← Ch. 103 | Ch. 105 → |